The myth of self-confidence – finding a better way

Recently, I visited a bike repair workshop.

The bicycle mechanic who owned the store called me with a smile and asked me about the issue. The gears didn’t change without a hitch, and I said that to him.

 He took some time to do the repair work, took a road test and handed me the keys.

 During that period, I noticed how cool, relaxed and confident he was. The kind of self-assurance – where did that come from?

Now, I’m going to leave you with one simple logic using two situations. And then give you a bottom line based on that. Then you can tell me whether my logic is accurate or not. And finally, I’ll tell you what you can do to build trust. works?

 Let’s begin.

 Now, the first scenario is when the same mechanic visits a hospital and meets a doctor for a medical check-up.

 Is the mechanic going to show the same level of confidence that he showed in his garage? Or will he face a man more relaxed and confident than he is – the doctor – at the clinic?

The mechanic is not going to show his confidence when he’s in front of a doctor. If he does, he’ll sound silly and arrogant.

Let’s imagine the second scene – the same doctor visits the same mechanic’s shop to get his bike repaired.

Who do you think will be more confident in this situation?

Of course, the mechanic.

Perhaps he is more modest because the doctor who treated him is now his client. Nevertheless, his level of confidence is superior to that of the doctor.

The doctor can walk like a king in his clinic, but when he is in the mechanic’s shop, he needs to be quiet, listening and watching. Just like the mechanic at the clinic.

You understand the point I’m trying to make?

Both scenarios tell you a couple of things:

  1. You should not attempt to express your confidence when you are in an unknown location or a strange situation.
  2. If you want to build your confidence, you’ll need to build your forte.

 Self-confidence is not something you develop by posing to be confident. Or by using auto-suggestions. It develops by knowing who you are and where you fit into the world.

You’ll have to learn a skill and practice it so well that you’ll be the best in the world. (`Best in the world’ is a debatable topic. But you can be as good as possible for you.)

If you do that, self-confidence will follow you like your shadow. Because you’ve built your world around your skill.

But even in your world, you could go over the edge with your self-confidence. A mechanic with too much confidence can wreck a vehicle. And an overly confident doctor might kill a patient.

Is there some other way we can focus on strengthing self-confidence?

Well, there is one.


Consciousness is about being aware of oneself and its environment at the same time.

If you practice being aware all the time, you may be able to do well both in your world and in other people’s world.

As you develop that consciousness, you will naturally react to any situation. You won’t make mistakes. (Or a little bit.)

But how to expand awareness?

It’s through meditation.

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